How Bad Do You Want It?

hopeI had a conversation with someone the other day. She was struggling in some area of her business … like many of us of course. And what I kept hearing was the one word that quite frankly I think should be taken out of the English language, and that is the word “because.”

“I can’t do this because …”

“I can’t move forward because …”

“I can’t make it to networking meetings because …”

“I can’t buy that program because … “

“I can’t travel because …”

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m sure there must be some times when that word is valid to use — although I can’t think of any at the moment. But I think that we generally use it too often.

Why do we use the word “because” so often?

So we can justify why we can’t have the things we want in our life, do the things that bring us the most joy, or be the the person we were meant to be. It’s our scapegoat. Give a good enough reason and maybe you’ll eventually convince yourself that your reason why is actually the truth!



Do I mean well?


Love comes in many forms and sometimes that shows up as tough love; someone pointing it out that it’s time to get real with yourself. Listen. I can relate to some of what’s being said here. I’m not pointing the finger. These are some of the situations I myself have been through in my life. It’s called being human!!

You may be wondering, “This doesn’t make sense? Why would I do this? Why would I lie to myself so I can’t have, be, or do what I want in my life?”

In a nutshell, we behave and act in this way because what we WANT is not always aligned with our BELIEFS. There’s an internal conflict of interest.

Let’s see how this looks:

“I really want to do this program but I don’t have money for it”  equates to:

  • I either don’t value the program
  • I don’t value myself enough to make the investment, or
  • I don’t trust myself to do the work

“I would love to be there but I can’t travel because I have kids” equates to:

  • It’s too risky and I can’t take that risk
  • I don’t trust this trip would be worth it, or
  • I don’t trust myself to follow through

“I want to get out there and meet more people but I can’t seem to find the time to make it to networking events” really means:

  • I secretly fear being around other people (what if they don’t like me)
  • I’m not willing to put myself out there like that (it’s just too uncomfortable), or
  • I fear I don’t have anything to contribute

I once someone heard someone say we were born for success but programmed for failure. Isn’t that sad? We were born into this world FILLED with unlimited possibilities. But as we continued to grow, our hopes, dreams, and aspirations slowly but surely got pushed down and condensed into this itty-bitty box called “reality.”

And what does “reality” look like?


If I had a penny for everytime I heard, “You can’t do that because …” when I was growing up and even NOW, I’d be a very wealthy woman living a luxurious life on some island I owned.

Well I’m hear to say today — it’s time to break out and break free of the “reality” box of “because” and do just it.

Invest in that program.


Tell someone you love them.

Write that book.

Attending that networking event.

End the BECAUSE.

At the end of the day, when all is said and done, which life do you want to live? The life of childlike wonder where anything and everything is possible just because you desire it?  Or a life of would of’s, should of’s, and could of’s, that were passed down to you by others who bless their hearts didn’t know any better themselves.

I know which one I’d pick. How about you? How bad do you want it?

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    1. Yeah, unfortunately I think people manage to even hide the truth from themselves sometimes. So much easier to blame other people or situations. 😉

  1. Hello Michele,

    Those ugly and self draining words “I can’t” Sends chills down my back. Those are words that I do my best to remove out of my vocabulary because I know I CAN! Thanks for providing this awesome post. It rings true to us. I look forward to reading more of your posts in the future.

    Many blessings,
    Stacie Walker

    1. Hi Stacie,

      You’re very welcome! So glad it resonated with you. It’s an on-going process isn’t it? 😉

      Look forward to chatting again soon!


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